I really never knew that society had such an issue with color behind closed doors. In my household everyone looked the same and outside our doors we where all the same. As i grew older i realized that even though God created everyone equal, everyone wasn't raised the same. People are the way they are due to the circumstances around them and examples of what is right and wrong.
I can recall when i was about 8 years old give or take a few years was when i started to view people differently. I had a very close friend who i played with, had sleepovers with, and spent most of my time with. One day we where playing and her neighbor, another friend, told us her parents said she could no longer play with us. Later the reason being was because of me, what had i done i thought. It was explained going forward that it was just because i looked different. That memory stays in my head.
It brings me back to first time i saw the movie Imitation of Life with my mother. How everything seemed black and white. My heart was overwhelmed at listening to Mahalia Jackson sing. And how Peola thought that her world would be better if she could live like a white woman.
I can relate in some ways by looking at history and how it was perceived that you where better if you could pass. But at same time Miss Annie had to carry on with a broken heart. A love of a child so strong that she finally broke and it was too late for her daughter to mend her wrong.
I wonder if any of my ancestors came upon this and how they dealt with it. I know from my grandparents that there where some family members who where mixed/ mulatto. At this day and age i still think its like a generational curse.
The videos with lighter colored girls, with the longer hair, use of perms and relaxers, bleaching of the skin etc etc. Some do, some don't. But i can always recall some young African American girl talking about not liking those very features that make them who they are. I always tell my girls no matter what you are BEAUTIFUL! !!!